How do you lose weight? How do you work towards the life you want?

SHEER. GRIM. DETERMINATION.

(and a healthy sense of humor)


1/31/10

Day 29 - The Downside of Weight Loss

Morning all - I forgot to celebrate yesterday, so without further adieu:

4 weeks of working out EVERY DAY!!
and
1 week of eating healthy!!

It's all very exciting for me. One thing is making this journey very difficult. In my already packed schedule I have less time to "get things done." Since I workout every morning I have to get to bed at a reasonable time. What's wrong with that? You may ask. Well, I used to complete a lot of my projects late at night, and now I have to let things slide. Which doesn't make me happy. Plus being sick two days last week and getting nothing done has completely thrown me off with all my activities. Now, today I need to:
  • Finish three projects
  • Write four papers
  • Buy/find stuff for Saturday's set construction
  • Read four chapters from an awful textbook
  • Create a handout for my volunteer gig
PLUS:
  • Go grocery shopping
  • Prepare my meals for the week
  • Clean my house
  • Laundry
I know I won't be able to get it all done in the next day, so some will spill into Monday night and Tuesday night, so cross your fingers for me...off to complete an endless to do list.

1/30/10

Day 28 - Blogger Award and Weigh-In

Afternoon bloggerland,

I had a weigh-in this morning, good news, I lost 2 lbs, yea! I think it would've been more if I wasn't sick the past couple days, but I'm glad I broke the 2 lbs mark.

In more local news, 266 was kind enough to bestow my first blogger award on me, yea! I'm amazed at the amount of quality bloggers I have found over the past month, and I am so glad I decided to enter bloggerland to help with my weight loss journey.

To celebrate this award I need to first list 10 things that make me happy:

1. My brother, I don't know how I would've survived without him.
2. My BFF, Andi, I am so lucky to have a friend that "gets me" and listens to my constant stream of bullsh*t.
3. Being independent - owning a home, paying bills off - never thought I would make it here.
4. Theatre - watching it, working in it, living it.
5. Working with teenagers - believe it or not.
6. Road trips!!!
7. My bed, my comfy comfy bed.
8. Finally, FINALLY, working towards a healthier life.
9. Completing a project.
10. Endless possibilities.

And now to recognize some others, I went through all the bloggers I am currently following and being followed by, tried to find folks I enjoy that haven't recently received an award:

1. Tisha at http://tallensweightloss.blogspot.com/
2. Little Ms Blogger at http://littlemsblogger.blogspot.com/
3. Tina at http://fatgirldivesin.blogspot.com/
4. Get Fit After 40 at http://getfitby40.blogspot.com/
5. Missa at http://losingethel.blogspot.com/
6. Carolina Girl at http://thirtyawakenings.blogspot.com/
7. She Woke Up Fat at http://shewokeupfat.blogspot.com/

Ok, only made it to 7, most people I have met in bloggingland have recently won one (that's how I found them:) But I love these blogs so I would like to give them one. Not that I don't love the other blogs (holy crap, why am I feeling so guilty)...

Anyway, I'm sure if I win another one I will be following even more peeps and feel like I have a right to give it to anyone I d*mn well please (not that I didn't want to give it to the 7 listed above - holy sh*t what is wrong with me today?!?).

I'm going to stop while I am (semi) ahead.

Love you all in bloggerland, will talk to you soon!

1/29/10

Day 27 - Doubts

Hi all - still sick, and I will post about my blogger award tomorrow, but I just don't have the right energy today. Didn't manage a great workout today, but I did do one, so that's good. When I am sick, like so many others, I have a negative voice that is more prevelant in my mind which I would very much like to  SHUT UP! It's the one that sounds like a combination of every mean girl I have come across. She says to me:
  • You will never. EVER. be skinny.
  • You've always been FAT just accept it.
  • You will never stick to anything.
  • You will never make anything of yourself, cat lady.
  • No man will ever love you.
  • You're pathetic.
  • I don't know why you even try, you know you will fail.
  • Why aren't you just happy with you 9-5 job, you should be grateful and give up on your "dreams."
I really think these thoughts are a natural part of growth. When I was younger, I gave into these thoughts. I quit jobs, friendships, dreams and sadly I believed this voice in my head. Now that I am (older and) wiser I know that these thoughts stem from fear and doubt. When I don't worry about the future, I am happier. Who really knows what the future will bring? All I know is that I need to do everything I can today.

Here's to hoping we can all make that voice of doubt a little smaller today.

1/28/10

SQUEAL!!!!

One more update for the day, received my first award from 266 will post about it tomorrow, but too excited not to say something about it now!

Day 26 - Is it me?


Hi World - been ill today, managed a workout this morning before the sicky monster hit me and have eaten well. So I wanted to post a super, happy, jolly, cheerleading post to help me through the day.

Thoughts I am looking forward to:

Is it me or...

  • did he just check me out?
  • is my waist looking small?
  • is my a*s looking tight?
  • is my skin glowing?
  • am I looking totally hot?
  • did I just fit into a size 6?
  • do I look amazing in this strapless dress?
  • did that no-whip, no-syrup, no-sugar plain coffee just taste fantastic?
  • do I look great in a swimsuit?
  • did an hour of cardio used to be hard?
  • did that mean girl from high school totally not recognize me?
  • did I just buy “normal” clothes in a “normal” store?
  • did I just meet my goal of losing 77 lbs?
Keep on truckin ya'll :) Back to bed for me.

1/27/10

Day 25 - A toast to my fat

I posted a lot yesterday, so to try and balance everything in my life, here is a little ditty for your enjoyment.

This one is for my nearly lifelong companion, you the fat the clings to my waist. You, my  fat friendemy:

Here's to you and here's to me,

But now that I want you to leave,

F*** YOU and here's to me!

1/26/10

Thank you notes Tuesday, with a twist - Couldn't resist


Think Tank Momma
Thanks to Dual Mom who borrowed it from Think Tank Momma, I decided to join the bandwagon and try my hand at being snarky with a few thank you notes:

Dear Teacher:

Thank you for reusing your teaching materials for the past 5 years and only partially editing them for this class. It has really been a f*cking fantastical way for me to stretch my brain to try and figure out if something is due on a Tuesday or Wednesday. Also, I have really appreciated the added bonus of reading chapters that I didn't have to read. I can't tell you how many times I am sitting around doing nothing thinking "Gee, I really wish I had some more textbook chapters I could read." Oh and by the way keep the vague criticism coming, I love guessing what the h*ll you meant by your last comment, it's a real f*cking brain teaser.

Dear Cats:

You know what I love? Coming home to see you have ripped into a trash bag. It reminds me of how to stay on top of my cleaning. Just think, before you barged into my life I would actually leave a trash bag in the living room for 10 minutes before taking the hike to the dumpster. Please know when I am trying to cook dinner and I trip over you because you are waiting for a potential food drop, it reminds me how important it is to stay on my toes. Geez without you I would be completely lost.

P.S. I love it when you sit on a table and stare at me, it is really comforting to know that you are waiting for me to die love me so much.

Dear Furnace:

It's like winning the lottery with you when you work. We've had a good last month, but remember when it was -30 outside and you would not turn on? That was awesome, it was like playing Russian Roulette - a real adrenaline rush. A*S Thx!!!

Dear Person Who Hit My Car And Left The Scene:

Thank you. Thank you so much for hitting my parked car so hard that I could drive it. Because of you I had the pleasure of driving a POS for three weeks with the added benefit of paying for it. Good thing you didn't leave your information, because it probably would've been a huge pain in the a*s for you and financially straining. I would hate to see you have to deal with anything like that. Lucky for me, it was a dream to deal with and taught me many life lessons. F*ck Thank you so much.

Dear Helpdesk:

Don't worry about fixing my laptop, it's no big deal. I know you have a lot on your plate and really at the end of the day my problem isn't that important. What do I need to connect to a network for? I can get so much done without email and internet access. I've really learned how to "do without." Thanks.

Dear Nameless Colleagues:

Thank you for letting me know you are too busy to meet that deadline or work on that project. I'm glad you told me in such a timely manner so that I have ample time to get it done. God forbid, you miss a night out, yoga or your favorite TV program to work on this. It's not really your job after all is it? Oh, it is? No worries, it's not like I have anything else to do. I am here to serve you. I know you need it done by Friday (for some f*cking reason completely unknown to me) and you need it done "like you would do it" because you so f*cking perfect and everything. You are so much better, smarter, more creative than I could ever be. You're the biggest f*cktard on the planet best!

Dear Extended Family:

Whenever we see each other, I just feel so dang welcomed by you. You always tell me how proud you are of my parents, my brother and me. And you are soooo open-minded. You've opened my eyes to all the different points of view there are in this world. You've always been so supportive of me being from parents of two different religious and ethnic backgrounds. You give me the nicest compliments on my physical features. It has become our regular game, hasn't it, trying to figure out if my hair is Mexican or Irish. How did my skin come out so pale? It's like a hereditary mystery. So proud to call you my family, thanks!

Dear Twilight Fans:

I love how much parade your love of Twlight. It is really interesting to me, really. I read the book, it was awesome, really awesome, so completely awesome. The writing was amazing, truly amazing, spectacularly amazing. And Edward? He is beautiful, so beautiful, so breathtakingly beautiful. No, I totally agree with you, Interview with a Vampire was too bloody and too dark. Vampires should glitter. Thank you for showing me the light.

Hmm, originally I was just going to do one, but d*mn that felt good! (kiss a*s apology to any Twilight fans who read my blog - please don't stop following/reading my blog, I will never mention it again)

Have a good night!

Day 24 - New template

I found a template background that I like better, so I'm using it for the time being. I should be able to figure out how to make my own, but that means finding some extra time in my days. Which is next to impossible, for anyone that knows me IRL, when I am busy I am really busy and I go from 6am to 10pm most days. Between work, part-time work, part-time school and volunteering, I don't have a lot of "me" time. Most of the time I really enjoy most of what I do, so it doesn't seem that bad. Also, I used to not really do anything, so I feel like I am playing catch up.

I had a break from most things for a few weeks until 1/11. For some reason I have had a harder time (I think) than normal getting back into the swing of things. I have also had more bitter thoughts about not having much "free" time. It's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel and not feel like I am running on a hamster wheel.

But if all goes as planned (or as not planned) I will not always be in this situation. Or if I am, I will be spending more time working with friends or working on things I truly love.

Working out is going well, I only did about 15 minutes this morning, because I really did not want to get out of bed (my bed was the perfect temperature and it was that dusky pink sunrise light - yes I was in bed until sunrise - and my cats were both in the way of getting out of bed) and my sore leg. The leg is better this afternoon though so I should be fine to go back to Tae Bo tomorrow.

Anyway, back to work, thanks for the break, blog world :)

1/25/10

Day 23 - Fortune

I am so freakin' sore. My thighs feel like evil fairies are pulling my leg muscles in every direction possible...of course it might help if I took a pain reliever instead of b*tch about it...

I don't have great luck with psychic readings, palm readings or fortune cookies. They usually come out with very negative futures. I am happy to report I did recently get a good fortune cookie:

"Your dreams are never silly depend on them to guide you."



1/24/10

Day 22 - Belated Celebration


In my blogging brilliance yesterday, I forgot to mark another milestone.


THREE WEEKS OF WORKING OUT EVERY DAY!


I'm sure this is the longest I have ever been in this great of a routine and I think blogging is really helping me along this journey.


Feeling awesome,



1/23/10

Day 21 - SATURDAY, DON'T LEAVE ME!!!

Today is my last "free" Saturday for a couple months. My part-time job will swallow at least 8 hours of my Saturdays each week until the middle of March. I feel like I should say goodbye to another day that I can wake up without the WREH WREH WREH of my alarm clock.

Saturday,
I will miss the great times we have had over the past couple months. Know that I love you and will be waiting with open arms for your return in late March. Farewell, sweet friend, I will think of you often.
Love and longing,
Heather



I just completed the Instructional DVD for Tae Bo and I can say without any hesitation Tae Bo will undoubtedly kick my A*S!

And in more local news, me and my Wii Balance Board are still friends. I lost 1.3 lbs. this week, yea! The loss was surprising since it was the only day this week I weighed less than my last weigh in, timing can be everything!

Feeling good,



Photo by: Liz Noffsinger



1/22/10

Day 20 - Long Hallways


My morning brain has started catching on to what is in store each morning, so getting up to do them has been a little rough this week, but I've still managed to kick my a** out of bed. I've had a couple late nights for homework and work but when I'm running late I still manage to do 20 minutes of cardio.I have been going up and down the two flights of stairs at work more to compensate a little. I have a weigh-in coming up on Saturday. Not sure if I will want to kiss or punch my Wii Balance Board, but we shall find out. I have been weighing in everyday and it is not looking like this will be a loss week, but I will try and trick my awake brain into a second workout tonight. I know I probably shouldn't weigh in every morning, but when I'm not using the Wii Fit Plus to workout I still don't want to miss my Mii's fist punch when I check in for the day. 

I’ve seen a lot of "small" ways to help with weight loss, you can modify your everyday activities to burn more calories throughout the day.

  • Take the stairs instead of the elevator
  • Park far away from the store
  • Take a lap around the grocery store before shopping
  • Do leg lifts while sitting at your desk
  • Crunches while watching TV
  • Take my cats for a walk (my mom so wants a picture)

There is a long hallway (think The Shining) that I go through to get to the break room. I’ve started upping my pace on how fast I am walking down this bright white hallway. Who knows, before you know it, my co-workers may have the joy of watching my swishing butt speed walking down the hall.


BTW, I am completely psyched about now receiving some comments on my blog - for a some days I felt like a weight loss blog loser. Reminded me a lot of high school. Reading and lamenting about how awesome other people's blogs were, hoping they might look my way...and some of them have! Thanks to you commenters I feel like I have a blog-a-sphere home. I will try to keep it interesting and updated.


1/21/10

Day 19 - It's Supplementary My Dear Watson


"Take your vitamins" mother says. "Of course, everyday!" I say. But I lie. Do I feel better when I take my vitamins? Yes. So why not try to take them everyday.

When at the store over the weekend I finally stocked up on the vitamins that I like:
  • One-a-Day
  • OregaMax
  • Super Omega-3
I'm not an expert by any means, but I think from everything I have read you should take a daily vitamin and get Omega-3s. The OregaMax is new to me, but while my mom (thanks mom) was in town over the holidays she touted the benefits of oregano. I have been a sicky since I was a young kid. I got strep throat for years growing up and at least twice a year a get a horrific sinus or bronchial infection. Oregano is supposed to help boost immunity. The best way I have found to make sure I take vitamins on a regular basis is to keep a supply at work and at home. I have the pills sitting by my mousepad at work so at some point after lunch I see them and remember to take them. The weekends are more sporadic, but at least I get them 5x a week.

1/20/10

Day 18 - Cat Lady

Another saga from Days of Being Fat:

I have two cats which I rescued from a cornfield. I never wanted to own cats (being a single girl afraid of the cat lady label), but as soon as I saw these two kittens I knew that they were mine. Anyway, they go to the vet twice a year. One of the cats, Finnegan, is a little heftier than the other, Husker. During Finnegan's check up, in between the snarls and scratches he is inflicting on the vet, I ask the vet "Do you think Finnegan is too fat?" The doctor pauses a second, looks me up and down and says "No, I don't think you have to worry about Finnegan."

1/19/10

Day 17 - Where did my neck go?

Today I woke up in a much better mood. I can't figure out what triggered the mood yesterday. Guess I had a "case of the Mondays." Eck. I had a pounding headache which started after I worked out, so maybe the mood was a sign of things to come...who knows.

I can still smell the stank of b*tchiness on my clothes, but I am more able to take on the rest of the week today. And boy do I have to take on the rest of the week since I didn't get as much done as I should've this weekend. I have had a few weeks off from school, theatre and volunteering - and I got a little spoiled with my weekends. I guess I will have to start scheduling my "me" time. And no, to me working out does not count as "me" time to me...yet.

Yesterday, while in my migraine stupor, I thought about some of the ways I realized I was fat. God, I hate that word. It is funny that realizing your size is a process. It happens by little bits, which you ignore and push out of your mind. Then one day it hits you, "Where the h*ll did my neck go?" I've never had a long ballerina neck, but I know I used to have a place to put a necklace. It went on like that (at least for me) for years. Making the decision to workout everyday was easy. Actually doing it took a few more months.

I can blame my weight on a lot of things, I think we all can, but when it comes  down to it: I eat too much and I don't move enough. Just looking in the mirror and willing your neck to return doesn't work.

1/18/10

Day 16 - Worst mood

I woke up in a terrible mood. Worked out and still in a terrible mood. WTF? Keeping a smile on my face, read somewhere that will boost your mood - or will it just boost the mood of those around you to see a frozen clown smile on your face?

1/17/10

Day 15 - The weighting game

It is so inspirational to read other weightloss blog stories. Jack Sh*t, Getting Fit is a kick in the pants.

I didn't make it to the movies last night, instead I started review some of my movie files to find some stuff to use for my next assignment. If you want a really good motivation for losing weight, watch yourself on video. Sure there is that whole "the camera puts on 10 lbs." thing, but I know better. I have watched so many videos of my classmates that I know it is a fairly accurate picture. You can only delude yourself so much with:
  • The camera angle was different on my shoot.
  • They must have used a wide angle distortion lens.
  • My clothes were really baggy that day.
  • Well, stand anyone next to Skinny Chic and they would look fat too.
  • Bad lighting.
Morning workout went well. I think I am going to stick with My Fitness Coach this week.

I can't wait to reach my goal. It feels like it is a lifetime away, but I know it is going to make so many things different. I know that once I am more comfortable in my body I will be able to do things that I would never have the guts (or have too much gut) to try today. The video production and theatre industry is filled with fit people and a lot of the work I would like to do is physical. Let's face it, no one is going to want to hire the "fat" girl, no matter how good I am.

1/16/10

Day 14 - Going Bananas

Two weeks. That's right, two weeks of crawling out of bed at 5:30 in the morning, a little later on the weekends, and working out for at least 30 minutes. It's a milestone, right? I think so...no...I DEEM it so! I've started a routine of eating a banana before my workout, somewhere I read that was a good idea. What initially started my hunt for what to eat before a workout was an article I read that said eating 90 minutes before working out was optimal, but that is not an option for me since I have to workout first thing or else my fully awake brain will find a devious scheme to derail the plan.

I love working out with the Wii. I was doing Wii Fit Plus the first week and have moved on to My Fitness Coach. The main reason was to make sure I am kept interested and having to workout for 2-6 minutes with the Wii and pick another activity is really annoying in the morning. I did 45 minutes of cardio on the Wii this morning and it was a good workout. I don't know what I will do if I go to a class with a living breathing trainer. I am so used to cussing out the fit bodied trainer's avatar on the screen that I don't know if I could curb that urge in public. I picked up some other Wii workout games and some DVDs so I am excited to try those out to. Tae Bo anyone?

While driving to Chick-Fil-A this afternoon (that's right! EVIL!) I realized my weight loss goal is eerily similar to my birth weight - 77 lbs., born 7 lbs. 7 oz. It's a sign! Of what? Not sure.

I have so many things to do this weekend, and have I started any of it? No. I have a set to design, homework to do and house cleaning. It's only 4pm, I could get something done today...then again The Book of Eli is also calling my name...I will go grocery shopping tomorrow. I eat so much better when I get in a weekly shopping routine, so it has to be done.

1/13/10

Day 11 - Introduction to me

Greetings all! I'm a legal assisting, theatre geeking, college attending, volunteering, book reading, tv watching, road tripping, nearly thrirty-something single lady who owns cats.

I am starting a blog to help get in shape and keep accountable. My plan is to workout every morning for 30 minutes. Eat less, move more. That's the motto, right? I'm on day 11 of working out every morning and feel like I am getting into a routine. Of course, this week a lot of things start up for me, so hopefully I can keep on a routine. The real goal is only 5 days/week, but I think if I try to aim for every morning I will easily reach that goal.

The Wii and DVDs will be my workout partner until I feel confident enough to start going to classes and groups. I have been using Wii Fit Plus and started My Fitness Coach today. It was a core workout and a lot of time was spent on the floor, which I don't really enjoy. But I did it.

The goal is to lose 77 lbs. I'll set up a ticker and such.

This weekend I will start a Sunday routine of cooking and shopping for the week. I think this will help with the "Eat Less" part.